The Idea of an Essay, Volume 4

Narrative & Memoir 29 on leaving right after chapel to eat quickly and study, so I sat alone in the back. In the middle of worship, I felt my phone vibrating. I looked down and saw that my mom was calling. Typically, my mom had been very aware of chapel times, so to receive a call at that time was odd. I stepped outside into the coatrooms to take the call. “Hello?” “Hi, it’s Elizabeth. Mom really wants you to be praying. Rebekah’s still sick and is feeling awful. We’re taking her into the ER now, and mom’s afraid something is more seriously wrong with her. She’s crying and its a mess.” I made a point to talk to Rebekah briefly, told her I loved her, and to hang in there because I had a gift for her when she could eat again. I talked to mom who feared Rebekah was having kidney failure or maybe even had Crohn’s Disease, but it’s wasn’t clear yet. I hung up the phone, and my heart sank. God is a jealous God, a God who desires our all, and here I felt Him beginning to test what I treasured most. I was scared by what God might allow to bring me to fully rely on Him. I feared the worst. I headed back into chapel, but a dark fear had settled on me. As I walked back into Chapel, I heard the song ‘Count Your Blessings’ beginning to play. The joyous music played as everyone enthusiastically sang along, but I stood in the back, frozen with a fear of what the future held. As I weakly tried to mouth the words, the song reached the chorus ‘count your blessings name them one by one...’ I felt hot tears burn down my face as my mind wandered, and I paused to name each of my siblings. I realized my biggest God- given blessings are people and they’re my siblings. Noah and I returned home for Thanksgiving, and Rebekah was still sick. She’s had been feeling a bit better though, and wasn’t hospitalized. The doctors determined she had clostridium difficile (c-diff), and decided to run tests for Crohn’s. Overall, it looked like she was going to be sick for about another week and then start getting better. Despite the contact precautions, I hugged her goodbye, and headed back to Cedarville. A week later I headed into finals week, and Rebekah still hadn’t gotten better. Near the end of finals, she was admitted to a hospital for sharp intestinal pain and they ran more tests. The tests