Inspire, Summer 2004

22 Summer 2004 “This loss is real!” However, she explained that grief should not include bitterness. “Hanging on to bitterness is like snuggling up to a poisonous snake. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself, including your immune system!” she noted. Along with these insights, Karen says she has learned that one of the best ways to deal with pain of any type is to get involved in the lives of others. Though some days it is hard for Karen to get up and move about, she loves to talk and laugh with other people. And though her children are grown and no longer living at home, Karen keeps in close communication with them. Karen enjoys talking with Rachel many mornings while her daughter commutes to work. That is a very special time for both. “We laugh and talk and just enjoy each other,” Karen shared. In addition to connecting with others, Karen says it is important to seek really good medical advice. “Don’t self- diagnose,” she warned. “Get a second opinion if need be.” She said support groups are good, but cautioned against letting them become too big of a focus. Reading has been therapeutic for her. Researching new technologies, treatments, and medicines is very helpful. Reading biographies of people she admires has also been inspiring. The books that have been most helpful to Karen include Anatomy of an Illness by Norman Cousins and The Gift of Pain by Philip Yancey and Paul Brand. Karen added that she cannot overstress the importance of Scripture memory. “Often there is nothing else to do while waiting for pain meds to kick in,” she explained. “You can’t take a Bible into an operating room!” Finally, Karen added, “It is important to have emotional money in the bank before problems arise. Some days only my eyebrows feel terrific and that’s OK.” ... Karen is the picture of grace under fire. She weathers pain like a rose which, though battered in a storm, remains strong, sharing its ever-present beauty even as dark clouds hover above.