Torch, Spring/Summer 2011

Spring–Summer 2011 | TORCH 29 the TV stayed off, but we have yet to commit to any change. This two-week fast may be exactly what we need to jump-start a healthier family life.” The following is from Danielle’s journal as she recorded the family’s technology fast. Day 1: December 27 Boy, are we cranky. The kids seem extra loud, and my usual go-to plan is unplugged. I am regretting our decision already as I watch Olivia (“Liv,” as we call her), still in her coat, sitting and staring at the dark screen with tears in her eyes. “No more shows? Why?” The eight-hour drive home from family Christmas celebrations would have provided ample opportunity to warn her about our decision, but I guess we just didn’t want to be in that close of proximity while her 4-year-old mind came to terms. Duncan, being only 1 year old, does not care … yet. Justin cancelled the cable service while we were visiting family. Now that we are home, there can be no wavering. A TV with access is too much temptation. We realized our TV viewing was a problem when we “couldn’t find the time” to do other things we enjoyed. Bible study reading was postponed until the last minute; my favorite hobby gathered dust; and time with the kids seemed forced. Something had to change. Liv was also having TV issues. One night when I told her we were going out to dinner, she complained she would miss her show and couldn’t go. That was the last time I ever wanted to hear that. On school days, we do pretty well curbing the TV, but in the summer and on weekends, the TV usually comes on at 8 a.m. and goes off at 7 p.m. (But it’s mostly PBS, I promise.) This began when I was pregnant with Duncan. I was tired and needed something for Liv to do. Then it was because I had a newborn and was tired. Then it was summer, and the days were long. Now … it’s just habit. She only watches a few minutes of it here and there, but it is always in the background and seems to distract from real play. We made the decision to cut the cable for a little while to gain some balance. (In all honesty, it wasn’t entirely by choice. Our cable bill doubled after an introductory price ended.) Now we are home, the kids are in bed, and the unpacking is finished. Justin and I sit down to relax and stare at the dark screen. The house seems too quiet. Day 2: December 28 Liv has asked for the TV on several occasions, but when I say, “No,” she finds something else to do. Duncan still doesn’t care. I seem to be the only one slightly perturbed that my background noise is gone. There’s other noise in the house; I just miss the happy kiddie music attached to the shows. Then I remember … before DVDs, we used to have these things called CDs that play music! We try it out. It’s a hit! Day 3: December 29 I had no idea how many quiet opportunities the TV afforded me as a mom. I know I have wrongly used it as a babysitter, and every parenting book I’ve ever read has warned me against it. But without it, I don’t eat. I guess this fast is twofold. I have had to engage the kids more to keep them busy, which is great. But it is exhausting. I put in a DVD for Liv today. Both kiddos were mesmerized. Liv asked for another. I obliged. I’m getting so much done! Dinnertime stinks. We have always eaten at the dining room table in sight of the living room TV. Liv typically takes a bite, watches her show while she chews, and takes another. We sporadically toss in a school-day question which she may or may not answer, and dinner plugs along. Without the TV, Liv takes a bite, gets out of her seat to do random things, and is repeatedly told to get back up in her seat. This goes on until I’m too tired to care, and she is too cranky to finish. I miss the TV