Torch, Summer 1992

?" u or Nancy Abels, caring for mentally disabled adults is not ust her full-time job, but her life's ministry. As a counselor at Shepherds, a home in Wisconsin providing "Compassionate Christian Care for the Mentally Disabled" for its 160 residents, Nancy oversees a group of women in their living units and work settings. Nancy has learned that showing compassion can take as many forms as the individuals God has created. "Caring can mean taking time out to listen to the residents, giving them a hug when they need it, smiling at them as they pass by, or just being with them." That sounds like something any Christian can do, but Nancy finds that people regularly ask her whether working at Shepherds takes a "special gift." She replies, "I don't think ministering here at Shepherds takes someone very special, just someone who regards each resident as a worthwhile individual. It takes a listening ear and treating each one as a person rather than just a disability." The twelve residents in Nancy 's care have individual needs. Some have physical needs while others need assistance in dealing with problems they encounter with work or family. When Ruth, a former resident, was diagnosed with cancer, Nancy had to meet her physical and emotional needs. As Ruth 's illness worsened she went home to her mother. Nancy continued to call and write Ruth, and helped the other eleven ladies cope with Ruth ' s illness. When Ruth went home to be with the Lord, Nancy helped her friends face the issue of death and comforted them as they were grieving. Some of the ladies have elderly parents. Nancy helps the residents to understand the aging process. Sometimes aging parents are unable to have their children visit them at home because it is too difficult for the parents. Nancy answers the residents ' questions and concerns about their parents and helps them keep in touch. When the residents are feeling lonely or sad, Nancy takes time to do something special with them. Sometimes she will take them shopping or out to eat. Each resident receives one-on-one counseling time to discuss her job, her free-time activities, and any prayer requests she may have. The counseling time provides an opportunity for Nancy to become better acquainted with the residents and their personal needs. Nancy can also use this time to find out more about the residents ' families. "We want this to be a home situation, not just a place where these people live. We want to make it as family -oriented as we can ." Sharing prayer concerns can be an important way of caring. "One girl brought a request to me about her sister– in-law who was going to have a baby. A few days later I asked how her sister-in– law was doing. That's one way I show the ladies that I am concerned not just about them but about their families." Nancy tries to help the residents learn to show their concern for one another also. She sets aside times for group discussion and activities. "These experiences help them think about others and learn to do things with other people." When training new workers, the Shepherds staff teaches them to get to know the residents-what pleases them, what upsets them. "The most important thing is to keep in mind that they are not just their disabilities. We need to help them reach their fullest potential. Sometimes that is far beyond what their IQ says they can achieve." Nancy says she has learned a lot from the residents. "The little things they do for one another remind me to think more about people as people in church or out in the community." That may mean something as simple as holding the door open for an elderly person at church or in a store. Nancy says just paying attention to people can brighten their day tremendously. The ladies also show compassion to her. One day when Nancy was going on vacation, JoEllen said, "You have a good day. We'll pray that you have a good safe trip." Nancy remembers, "She was completely open and not thinking about herself. It was a reminder to me that you have to stop and think about those things, that you can ' t take them for granted. You ' ve got to appreciate the people around you." Nancy emphasizes that her ministry is work, but it's where God wants her to be. Her confidence should encourage anyone who is reaching out in compassion, even those who feel their ministries in the home or church are too simple to be important. "You ' re going to have difficult times, but it 's going to work out because God wants you there." Nancy Abels began her ministry at Shepherds in 1979 after earning a degree in psychology! behavioral science at Cedarville College. Shepherds is a non-profit, residential care and vocational training facility for moderately to profoundly disabled adults. To find out more about the ministry, seek help for a mentally disabled person, or schedule a Shepherds gospel team for your church, write Shepherds, P.O. Box 400, Union Grove, WI 53132 or call 414-878-5620.