Torch, Winter 1983

6 presence of lonely and forgotten people in our pews is not always the result of deliberate exclusion on anyone's part. Several frustrating problems , however, seem to contribute to this . There is the continuing problem of ignorance. That is, we simply never stop to realize that there are other people who have needs that are perhaps different from ours, but are very real, nonetheless . You see , Christ does know each of our needs intimately. While we could never be omniscient , yet in our goal of Christlikeness, we can determine at least to become cognizant of other people and to actively seek to acquaint ourselves with their needs in order to reach out to them where they are. It is often in ignorance that our church emphases fail to minister to the church family as a whole. Consider, for example, the widow or single who is constantly confronted with an emphasis on the Sweetheart Banquet, the couples retreat , or the lengthy series of messages on the family . No wonder he or she feels very alone and forgotten . Another problem is the ever present curse of not caring. Many Christians do recognize that there are others who would greatly profit by some special gesture of care and concern. We say, "I really should stop by or call and simply say I care." The problem is, we never do it. There are simply too many other things that we allow to consume our lives. As a result, the fellowship suffers. The fact is that God's love is always an active love - For God so loved the world that he gave . . . . It is not always the thought that counts. In the fellowship, a thought without action is meaningless . A final problem, perhaps the most serious , is selfishness. All of us have a desire to spend our time with folk with whom we feel comfortable - folk whose company brings enjoyment to our lives. As a result, we find our exclusive group and we become ingrown there because that's the place where we feel most comfortable and most secure. It is not that such relationships are wrong in themselves , for they are not. They can become unhealthy, however, when they are to the exclusion of reaching out to freely include others who have needs and with whom we have a common ground in Jesus Christ. Again, our Lord Himself is our example, Who in the midst of the eternal fellowship with the Triune Godhead, reached out to create us , love us, redeem us, and accept us (Genesis 1 :26,27; Romans 5:8; Ephesians I :6). It may be uncomfortable for us to reach out of the security of our own little group and broaden our vision and thereby multiply our ministry , but it is absolutely essential that we do so if we are going to address the needs of lonely and forgotten people in our churches. The point of all this is that our churches must become fellowships in the most complete sense of the word. We must get beyond the "hello, how are you?" stage and get down to the business of sharing ourselves with one another. It must go beyond the inclusion, based on surface similarities, of a select few . Rather, it must progress to a reaching out that includes every member of the family on the basis of the common ground that we have in Christ. The church family ought to be a little taste of heaven on earth where each child of God can find refreshment , encouragement, love , acceptance , and a sense of worth . TWO SUGGESTIONS Perhaps two simple suggestions will help us move toward that end. Think. Think about others as you come to church. Let's not ignorantly and carelessly get consumed with ourselves and our own things. Be alert to others and their needs. Our church constitution states that it is the responsibility of members to be friendly and sociable to members and others at the meetings of the church. That should go without saying, but perhaps we should think a bit more about the implications of that . Don't fall into the trap of being the last one to church and the first one out . Sometimes as much of a ministry can be accomplished in the vestibule and hallways as from behind the pulpit. It' s great to come to church expecting a blessing for yourself, and so it ought to be. However, determine as well to be a blessing to someone else. Think about others when social gatherings of the church are approaching . Most churches plan social times that have as their purpose the enhancing of fellowship. Yet, often the very folk who most need to be a part of the fellowship are absent. You may invite them, but they may never come. There may be reasons for their absence . Think about what it feels like to be a single or a widow or a new family, unacquainted, coming to a gathering with no guarantee of being with anyone. Think about how you would feel walking into a room where others have already "coupled off' and facing the prospects of sitting alone. What a blessing it would be if we did more than just invite folk, but picked them up and took them with us and acted as companions to them. Think about others as well during special times of the year, especially holiday seasons. While many of us gather together with our friends and those with whom we find great enjoyment, there may be others who for one reason or another are sitting at home without family and friends. Perhaps they are feeling very much alone and forgotten . Think about them . Do. Don't let good thoughts get lost in the shuffle of things. Make the effort to follow through with your concerns. It will take some effort and some time, but it will be worth it. The fellowship will be enhanced , the church will be strengthened, and God will be glorified. Rev. W. Paul Jackson is pastor of Grace Baptist Church in Cedarville, Ohio, where he has served for seven years . He is also on the Council of 12 of the Ohio Association of Regular Baptist Churches .